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The Marriage pyramid: what comes first before you say ‘I do’?


  I am about to share what I believe the order should be before you say ‘I do’. 
Over the years, too many singles have skipped certain important steps, only to start from the middle of the pyramid then come back to the beginning, hoping to get it right. It doesn’t work that way! If you follow the natural order, chances are that your marriage will flourish better. 
So, let us begin with the bottom of the pyramid then work our way to the apex.
1. Friendship
True friendship should be the basis of any marriage. If you cannot stand each other’s company devoid of sex and romance then you won’t stand the test of time as a married couple. Why? Well, because when you are married, you are not always in the mood for being lovey-dovey. So what happens then?
Friendship is a way to create a bond that lasts a lifetime.
2. Romance
As you go along as buddies, no strings attached, it is possible that feelings develop. This is when you realize you are attracted to each other and don’t want to be just friends. So, you still felt love at the point of being friends but now, the butterflies in the belly have come into the picture.
3. Commitment
This is where you take your relationship to the next step. Beyond being attracted to each other, you commit to a future together. At this point, you are fairly certain (marriage requires a leap of faith) that you have met your life partner.
4. Sex
Yes, I saved this for last and once more I will say that it is not solely for religious reasons. I have simply found that sex after a commitment which has been made makes both parties feel more secure, safe in the relationship. Ideally, sex is a culmination of emotional intimacy so if you aren’t emotionally intimate, sex is not whole.
So, there you have it.

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